Location: Fort Worth, Texas, United States

Mother of 3, grandmother of 3. Compulsive writer. Single, not especially "looking."

Thursday, April 5, 2007

Being Flexible

Someone just remarked that I was surely flexible, able to take changes in stride without comment. How do you do that? they inquired.

Flash! I am a military brat. You either changed with the flow, or you perished, psychologically if not physically. Here one day, gone the next? Not to worry. It happens to military brats. So in my adult life, I have come to expect the unexpected. That doesn't mean I welcome change -- after all, I am a Taurus, stubborn as all get out, and I resist in sublte ways until I finally realize there is no choice but to adapt.

Is this a handicap in my adult life? Maybe yes, maybe no. It depends on the degree of my resistance. Some things I won't change, some things I will. Especially when the choice is mine. I have learned that many things are outside our sphere of influence and whether or not I adapt is irrelevant. It's happening. Get over it.

I posted this morning on my Lupus blog this morning, too, about how I have added vertigo to my repetoire, and I don't like it one bit. Crashing about my bedroom first thing in the morning is not funny. Not when you lurch into a swivel chair and it throws you to the floor, bruising not only your fanny, but your dignity. So? I take my meds and wait for the room to quit spinning, grateful that at least I'm not throwing up, too.

Is this persistence a brat trait? Probably. I've been sick in some of the most exotic places in the world -- bronchitis in Korea, mumps in Austria, measles in Fort Sill OK. (Not that Fort Sill is exotic, understand. ) And the army docs took good care of me, even coming to our quarters (house calls!), dispensing APCs (All-purpose capsules) like they were bubble gum machine candy, and it worked. I wasn't crazy about whatever it was they added to the APC regimen when I had was a brown pill that had to dissolve in my mouth and it was bitter and tasted like -- well, medicine.

So today, I'm feeling like I'm lurching through life, but I know this, too, will pass. Maybe I should see the doctor again, if this doesn't get any better.

And now is a time I wish a good old army doctor would make a house call and give me some APCs and tell me everything is going to be all right.

But those days are gone. And I miss them like heck.

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Blogger Jeni said...

Keep plugging away there, Kid.
I remembered this morning to take my xanex (something I forgot about yesterday and ended up really edgy and depressed by late last night and my blog post pretty much reflected it too.) Xanex and caffeine - good mix or not? Gotta have the caffeine though to try to wake up and the xanex - try to take the edge off the other junk. Seems to be kicking in a bit now!

April 5, 2007 at 10:09 AM  

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